Taking the Tuk Tuk Express - A Four Part Mini-Series (Part 4 of 4)

Last we left off our hero was flying in his private jet to Phuket, the most popular part of Thailand for tourists to visit. It was also the most devastative part of the country. As we all know last December 26th, disaster struck this once renowned hot spot. A disaster by the name of "Tsunami".

We landed at around 9:30 am and took the first taxi to our hotel which we had already reserved the previous night. The taxi ride was actually a van packed with people. We actually met a couple from Calgary ... go figure. Now, here's a little chuckle of a story. It's normal for the taxi's to take slight detours to a travel agent (I'm telling ya if I was to start a business in Thailand it would be a travel agency). We were greeted by this very attractive travel agent, all dressed up professionally, long dark hair, great body ... the type of person we men would go ga ga over ... that is until this person opened HIS mouth. The manliest voice I have ever heard. Well, maybe not the manliest, but definitely quite alarming after seeing what HE looked like. Every guy in the van (including myself) kind of jumped back after hearing this unexpected sound. I had a little bit of a chuckle after that. Anyway, after spending a few minutes waiting for these people getting hackled, we headed to our hotel. Our hotel was another top notch one, not near the beach this time, but it was in a pretty nice location. The room was huge and in immaculate condition. We got settled in, then decided to walk towards the beach which was probably a 15 minute walk. As we were coming closer to the beach, I couldn't help but get a very eerie feeling. Although, a lot of this city has already been rebuilt, there were still lots of destroyed areas which have yet to be touched. One of the places that kind of brought sadness was a McDonald's of all places. This wasn't because I was craving a Big Mac and Fries, it was because I was thinking how old the employees were and how many them were killed. I know back home the average age is 14 or 15 years old, about the same age as my niece. That's only one example, there were lots of other places ... very sad. We walked along the beach (which still had a lot of debris) and since it was a nice day decided to hang out and go for a swim. I was sitting on the beach, people watching (of course). There was a young European couple with their 1 year old daughter to my right and to the left was a group of young locals playing soccer. The little girl was playing in the water, splashing away and loving it. It was nice seeing this sight because as I mentioned this was once one of the most tourist hot spots before the tsunami and now 4 months later it's starting to pick up again. It's because of us tourists that's helping this place get back on their feet again.

Now as I was sitting, I couldn't help but notice this young woman, who you could tell was most likely homeless and it might be because of the tsunami. Her clothes were raggety, old, and dirty. She was carrying a small shopping bag maybe with a few other clothes and some momentos. I was watching her as she was walking to the water, washing herself down, obviously didn't care she was in her clothes, then came back and sat on the beach stairing out into the horizon. I couldn't help but notice the sadness in her eyes. She sat there stairing for what seemed like hours, didn't move. I can only imagine what she was thinking about. She then got up, walked along the beach and we never saw her again.

After that feeling of morbidness, we decided to check out more of the city. This city is very touristy as I mentioned. There are tonnes of night clubs. Some are small little places that are along a strip and each strip has certain themes to them. There's one called the Tiger Discotheque which has the look of a jungle scene. We decided before I leave, we're definitely going to check out the night life here.

The next day we decided to take a day tour to "James Bond Island". It's called that because it's where they filmed the famous Bond movie "The Man With the Golden Gun". The first part of the tour was a bus ride to the caves where buddhists use as a temple to worship and pray. The caves were very cool, kind of like a scene from Indiana Jones. There were also lots of Buddha statues including a smaller version of the resting Buddha which I originally saw in Bangkok. Outside the caves were monkey's galore. We were able to purchase bananas or nuts to feed them. I was so choked ... I had a bag of nuts I was going to feed to them, but had trouble opening the bag. I knew I was in trouble when that sucker slipped right out of my hand. I don't even think it even touched the ground, because before I knew it this monkey snatched the entire bag and ran away ... doh! We then took a bus ride to Phang Nga Bay where we were going to take a boat ride. The bus ride was about 45 minutes long, so to pass time they put in none other than "The Man With the Golden Gun" for us to watch. Nice! The boat ride was great, all along the Bay were the spectacular limstone cliffs, caves with stalactites which made the caves look like they were dripping some kind of oozing pus ... k, I could've thought of a better visual, but I'm envisioning the sickened looks on your faces (ha ha). So, as I mentioned, one of the most famous limestone cliffs is James Island. It was neat to see especially after seeing the movie. The place was very touristy of course and lots of locals selling everything.

Our next destination was visiting a muslim village which are built on stilts. This was very cool to see. The entrance was of course full of markets and we were being bombarded by locals, including kids. But it was amazing to see how everything was built. All on wooden stilts (some concrete depending how righ they were) including the school. Now the school was quite amusing. Very small and maybe had only 3 class rooms in total as well as a small basketball court. I took a picture of one of the rooms, particularly the chalk board. Why the chalk board you ask? Well, it showed what was left of the last english lesson. Phrases like "Can you lower the price?" "Can you give me a discount?" "Yes, I can" "No, I can't". Ah, they're learning so young. Their parents would be so proud. We ate lunch at one of the restaurants near the entrance which I have to admit wasn't the greatest food, but at that point I was starving. The tour ended with another boat ride back to the bus and then back to our hotel. We finished watching the movie of course while heading back. All in all we had a great day.

After coming back to the hotel, we decided we were going to go out and enjoy the Phuket nightlife, since this was going to be my last night in Thailand. We went down to the main area where all the clubs were and decided to check out a couple of them. The first was more of dance club which to be honest really wasn't my scene especially in Thailand where you know that most of the women are there to make money off a foreign guy and the foreign guys were there to find one of these women. The bar was neat to see ... kind of reminded me of a combination of Tantra and Cowboys (if you live in Calgary you would know). We stayed there for about an hour. Just enough time to have our free drink ... well, not really free. We had to pay a cover charge getting into the bar but it included a free voucher. We then moved to another location. Actually, outside this club was an outdoor bar where there was a Thai Elvis impersonator. We stayed and watched him for a while. He was actually pretty good. Although it wasn't the same hearing Viva Ras Vegas! Unfortunately, we saw only the tail end of the show, so didn't stay very long. Next stop, the main strip where all the theme clubs were. Now, these were actually more discotheques that ... well consists of all kinds of ... "people". You have a mixture of women and men dressed like women and you can't tell which is which. Anyway, I wasn't planning on going into one of them until Leanne gave me the old "I Triple Dog Dare You" ... of course I said OK, for 1 drink. Just so I can say I experienced it. We chose the "Tiger" theme, sat down at one of the bars and ordered a drink. Now, I'm looking around watching everyone. The guys there were just enthralled with all these "women" dancing on the bars showing themselves off. I was just wondering if they realized that the one's who were really showing themselves off (in other words lifting their shirts bareing their fake breasts, dancing around) weren't actually women. There was one dancer we were watching who was really difficult to tell if she was a he or not ... Leanne and I looked at each other giving the "Maybe", "I don't know", "You think?" looks. From one angle this person looked like a woman, but then because of the caked on make-up we were thinking, nah it has to be a man. But, all I can say is this person spent a lot of money on plastic surgery. We moved on to a more quieter, normal looking bar which I might add was difficult to find. But, we found one where we sat and watched all the people walking by. Of course the foreigners and Thai women couples.

The next day, our hero's last day in this beautiful country, we decided to go on another snorkelling, boat tour. The entire day was mostly touring around on the boat. We spent some time snorkelling which actually had to be cut short because the weather was getting rough and it was difficult swimming around. I have to admit it wasn't as good as the one in Koh Tao. Although, the highlight of the tour, but yet the most disheartening part of the trip was sailing to the Phe Phe Islands. Disheartening because this was the island that experienced most of the devistation from the tsunami. Highlight because I was glad to see so many volunteers from all over the world volunteering their time cleaning up. We arrived there and I got such a hurt feeling in my heart. This again, was once the biggest tourist attractions with tonnes of luxury resorts, but most of it was washed away. To be honest, had I known we were able to volunteer, I would've taken a day and volunteered my time. But, instead I did the next best thing which was be a tourist. Sounds like a cop out, but as I mentioned we are their source of income. There was lots that needed to be done and of course lots that was already done thanks to these groups. We stayed on the island for a few hours and then headed back. As we were leaving, there was a group of volunteers who came with us. Apparently they stayed on this island for a month volunteering, cleaning up. It turns out they were a group from Canada, most of them from Manitoba. I actually ended up bumping into them later that evening. We all took the same flight back to Bangkok together. I talked to one of the members about their experience and he said although it was a lot of hard work, he felt good about doing it.

We came back to the hotel at around 7 that night. I still had a a few hours before I had to head to the airport. My flight wasn't leaving until 11 pm. So, we went along the beach again and grabbed some dinner. I wanted pizza because I was craving it and the pizza in Japan isn't the greatest. So, we found a pizza place where of course we could sit on the patio and watch people.

9 o'clock came around and our hero said his good byes to his friend (well, not really because he knew she was coming to visit Japan). He hopped on his private jet heading back to Bangkok at around 11 pm and arrived at 12:30 am. He had about 6 hours to wait for his flight back to Japan. So, he decided to find a first class style bed (floor) to rest until it was time to leave this country, end his adventure and head back to his next adventure.

This trip will of course, be our heros most memorable one!!

THE END

Memoires of a Royal Canadian Mounted Gopher

I've always been fascinated with travelling to different places. Seeing new sights and learning about different cultures. That's why when I had the opportunity to go to Japan, I wasn't going to pass it up. I've been travelling now for over 9 months and although the experience has been a rewarding one, there's always things you miss. Like your country ...

My name is Scott. I'm a voyager, an adventurer, free-spirited and ... a gopher. I'm Canadian and proud of it. This is my story. I just arrived in Osaka. As I mentioned it's been about 9 months travelling around. It seemed a life time ago since I jumped into that guys (oh what was his name ... slipped my mind) backpack and started my journey. Although my trip has been a rewarding one, there's always something you yearn for, something that reminds you of home. I wasn't sure why I was feeling this way until it suddenly dawned on me. Today is July 1st, otherwise known as Canada Day. That's why I had that feeling of emptiness. Being the proud Canadian as I am ...

"Oh Canada, our home and native land tru ...". Sorry, couldn't help myself. For some reason, everytime I get a funny feeling in my foot like someone is squeezing it, I want to break into song ... very strange.

Anyway, where was I ... oh yes. Canada Day. So, I'm wandering in the Osaka train station wondering what to do on this special day when I spot a familiar sight. A black backpack with a Canada Flag on it. I was so excited, I quickly ran towards the person holding the bag. Dodging all the on coming non-canucks, nearly getting kicked around ... it doesn't pay to be short. Anyway, I managed to catch the guy:

Scott: Hey ... Happy Canada Day, eh?
Man: Huh?
Scott: (rolling his eyes) Down here!
Man: Ohhh ... hey, same to you!
Scott: What's your name?
Man: Joe
Scott: Hey Joe! Where ya from?
Joe: Calgary
Scott: Hey! What a coincidence, so am I!
Joe: Sweet! What are you doing for Canada Day?
Scott: Don't know yet, you?
Joe: Yeah, I'm meeting 3 other friends from Calgary, wanna tag along?
Scott: Yeah!
Joe: Cool! Hop in my bag!

So, off I went with Joe, joining him and his friends. We met up with 3 others, Carl, Colleen and Leanne. Carl and Colleen are a married couple who live in Osaka and Leanne is a free-spirited traveller like me. She's been travelling for about 4 months all over Asia ... Sigh, that must've been cool. I heard something about each of them having nicknames, but I can't recall who was who, but there was Motormouth, Schmeeb, Wet and Babyface ... it had something to do with the Canadian Superpowers Team. Who knows! Moving on ... after meeting the other 3, who of course warmly welcomed me into their home, which apparently was amazing to Joe because I kept on seeing his awstruck face and mentioning something along the lines of "The kitchen is as big as my apartment". The festivities commenced with of course beer (unfortunately Japanese but it will do), nachos with salsa and cheese and of course Canadian music: Great Big Sea, Spirit of the West... I also heard some theatre music, I think these people were actors or something. I guess nobody's perfect. Later on after the beer was finished, I saw them dive into some home made plum liqueur ... I mean hooch (let's stay Canadian here). Joe brought it from where he lives, apparently he's a teacher and one of his students gave it to him. Oh and what's a Canadian party without spending time in the kitchen. After enjoying the wonderful Nachos, we decided to move into the living room and bring out the crib board. Ah yes, there's nothing like saying Happy Canada Day without that famous wood block and cards (with Canada Flags on them). I was waiting for the Trivial Pursuit game to be next.

As the time passed and a few crib games later, we all decided to take the festivities elsewhere. Carl mentioned something about a Canadian style Izakaya (Japanese bar). After a quick dress up and a few Canadian tattoos, we were on our way to our next destination. Apparently, this group decided to make me their leader. Which of course makes sense. After all I am the adventurer and a representatitive of Canada ... I heard something about being short, furry and cute, but I don't think that's the real reason. We arrived at the bar and I must say what a sight this was ... log cabin style, huge Canada Flag outside, we walk in and there were saddle chairs, plaid shirt wearing employees with rubber boots. It was an interesting sight. Of course nothing says Canada like Japanese style food ... oh well, so you can't expect perfection. We spent most of the evening at this pub enjoying the atmosphere. Although, I couldn't help but notice we were the only Canadians in the entire bar. I don't think they realized that today was Canada Day because every time I sang our national anthem, I kept on getting strange looks followed by laughing. Anyway, the night got even more exciting when one of the waiters started bringing out the Bingo. We played a few games ... Colleen even managed to win one of the games and knocked 2000 yen off our bill ... sweet! Well, THEIR bill ... I don't drink or eat for that matter, always on duty.

So, we continued our journey and decided to participate in another Canadian past time ... Karaoke. OK, so it's a Japanese pasttime, but we Canadians are starting to do it more and more, aren't we? There was only an hour and a half before last train, so we found the first place available. Unfortunately, it was the most expensive, but hey ... it was a celebration. I heard that this was Colleen, Carl and Leanne's first time in a Japanese style karaoke. Joe and I were chuckling seeing the amazed looks on their face. They didn't expect to be in a private room. Unfortunately, I didn't do any singing. I couldn't find my favorite songs ... "Oh, Canada" and those songs from the singing hamsters, they're the best! I did watch the rest of them sing one song after another. They sounded great. Leanne also didn't do any singing, she just kept on punching in random numbers. Carl and Joe did a pretty bad rendition of You've Lost That Loving Feeling. But, hey that's the beauty of having your own private room.

The 5 of us took the last train back to Colleen and Carl's apartment and hung out a little more talking. I sat and listened to Joe and Carl having an intellectual conversation about Saturday morning cartoons. Leanne and Colleen were in the kitchen, I think I saw them rolling their eyes a few times as Joe and Carl were continuing with their in depth talk. After watching the 4 of them, I realized that I picked a great bunch of people to hang out with.

The night ended at around 2 am and I heard something about going to Universal Studios the next day ... oh I was there.

The next day was difficult for the other 4 to get up. I kept on blasting my voice with the anthem, but they didn't seem to respond. Finally, Leanne was the first followed by the other 3. After realizing what we were doing today, everyone perked up, quickly got ready and headed to ... Universal Studios or Universal Stadios as they say in Japanese.

The day was not a very nice one ... pretty rainy, but that's Japan. Welcome to the rainy season. None of us cared of course because we were going to ... Universal Studios. But, apparently the rainy season was used to our advantage, Japanese people tend to stay home when it's raining outside. So, that meant hardly any people at the park which also meant short lines on the rides ... very nice. The 5 of us walked into this happy place. Me, in the lead of course followed by Leanne who was the map expert then Colleen who was doing her happy dance. I guess it was her first time at an amusement park. It's funny my foot needs to be squeezed in order for me to dance and sing, for Colleen she voluntaringly did a song and dance ... I'll never understand humans. Joe and Carl joined in of course, cause, well ... they're kids.

Looking at this place, I couldn't help but smile. every building had their little theme. The park was divided into 8 different themes like Jurassic Park, Amity Village, Hollywood and New York. Music from past movies were playing. Shrek and Fiona were greeting everyone as we were walking in. All I can think of was how happy this place was. We spent the entire day ... morning, noon and night wandering around this park going on rides such as Jurassic Park, ET, Back to the Future, Jaws and not to mention that "Amazing" ride Spider-man ... which we went on twice of course. There were also some 3-D shows like Shrek and Terminator (which we have to admit was the worst out of all of the attractions). We ended the night watching an excellent fireworks show. The entire day was fantastic.

So, you're all probably wondering if I ever left this group. Well, believe me I tried. I felt I was imposing on them. But, they all seemed to want me to stay, especially Leanne. For some reason she wanted to take lots of pictures of me ... I think she digs the uniform. I stayed one more day with the group, mainly because they were talking about seeing the sights of Osaka and I never had a chance to check out Osaka-Jo or Osaka castle. Jo means castle in Japanese as Joe kept on telling everyone ... I don't know why though. Anyway, the 5 of us checked out Osaka which I have to admit is quite the city. It does have a great night life and of course lots and lots of shopping especially if you're into name brands, electronics, etc.

As you can see my Canada Day weekend turned out to be a memorable one. I met 4 great people and had the time of my life. Although, I've been a lone traveller for 9 months, I decided that being with friends is much more fun. So, on Monday when Joe and Leanne were about to leave, I hopped into that black backpack (you know, the one with the Canada flag?) and headed back with them.

Now, as I mentioned in my email, I'm writing this on Joe's blog ... but he doesn't know, so I appreciate it if you don't tell him. Oh yeah, I'm also adding some pics I took of the weekend, so you can check them out.

Taking the Tuk Tuk Express - A Four Part Mini-Series (Part 3 of 4)

From last we left off, our hero was on his way to his next destination, Koh Samui. Riding on the fairy, enjoying the sun, the breeze, the view.

We arrived in Koh Samui at around 12 or 12:30. Of course, the usual drill ... bombarded by local people wanting you to rent a taxi, hotel, companion ... k, maybe not companion, but you get the idea. Luckily, we had arranged our transportation on the boat before we arrived. We actually realized that we got a smokin deal considering it took over half an hour to get to our hotel and it cost about 200 baht ($6). As we were driving along to our hotel, I was looking at what kind of place this was; quite spectacular. A little touristy of course, but we expected that.

The hotel was in a quieter area, which was nice. It was actually more of a resort hotel where we stayed in separate cabin's. They still looked like normal hotel rooms with the beds and washrooms, but we had our own little deck to sit and relax. As usual it was a sweltering day, probably over 35 C. Of course we were sweating bullets carrying our backpacks. All we wanted to do was check in and then head to the beach. When we were checking in, I couldn't help but notice the bell boy carrying 2 huge coconut drinks. I was saying to Leanne, wow whoever's getting those is very lucky. Before we knew it, this bell boy was coming our way and handing us those huge coconut drinks .... nice! Quite the service. So, we went to our cabin to dump off our luggage and preceded to explore the area ... basically wanting to know where that beach was. Well, to our pleasant surprise, it was only a short feet away. Man what a site ... crystal clear, turquoise water, white sand beach. It was a whole lot of heaven.

I think before we saw this little bit of paradise, we were planning on exploring this island, roaming around finding interesting sights. Experiencing everything they have to offer. Nahhhh .... there's always tomorrow. So, we pretty much spent the rest of the afternoon lieing on the beach, swimming in the ocean, (which felt wonderful I might add) , engrossing under the sun. Pretty much did what we've been doing the past week. I did, however, go walk around town to see what was there. I wanted to pick up some information on different tours for the next day. The town itself was a typical tourist town. Lots of foreigners, lots of shops selling souvenirs galore, restaurants, bars, etc. I went into a tourist office to pick up some information and got a brochure that certainly caught my eye ... Safari tours.

The next day, Leanne and I decided to do our own thing. She wanted to stick around and hang around the beach. Me? I wanted to experience the Safari like I never experienced it before. Going through the heart of the Jungle, driving through the rough roads where getting stuck is not an option. Then trekking through the pathless woods using nothing but a mashetti to get you to your destination of ... who knows? Living amongst the wild kingdom. Dining with monkeys, riding on elephants, swimming by the water falls with wild snakes, walking into the homes of spiders the size of beer cans. Ah yes, nothing like being a true Safari Adventurer ... Tarzan, eat your heart out! OK, so it's not exactly like that, but it was a fun day. I was with a group of 8 from different countries: Australia, France, Denmark and Belgium. We started off at a famous landmark called Grandpa Rock and Grandma Rock. Seeing these famous rocks gave me a feeling of of ... VIOLATION!!! These were the most phallic looking things I have ever seen and yes it is what you think and yes that is the reason why they were named GrandPA and GrandMA. It was interesting. Of course I had to take a pic. Our next stop was seeing the wild monkeys and watching one of them knock coconuts out of the tree. This particular animal was not the happiest of animals. All I can say is it was a good thing he was tied up otherwise we would've been hooped. At least he got some free coconut for us ... very kind of him. Continuing on with the wild animal theme, our next stop involved coming face to face with an elephant. Not only face to face, but on top of it ... for the first time, I experienced riding an elephant. I must say it wasn't the most exciting thing I've ever done. I could've swarn this thing fell asleep dozens of times while walking. There would be a constant, very slow motion then all of a sudden a stop ... then he would go again. I think I dozed off a few times. I don't see these beasts being in the next Queen's Plate. It was an interesting experience. Following that incredible *yawn* little trek, we drove through rough roads in the jungle to our next destination which was Samui Falls. Not much of a waterfall, but there was a section where you could go swimming near the falls which was so amazing. The water was absolutely perfect. If I had a choice, I would've ended the journey right there and just spend the entire day sitting by the falls. But, alas good things must come to an end, we moved on to our next destination which was another rough drive through the jungle (which I have to admit was very fun, four-wheeling through the woods, what more can you ask?). We arrived to a look out point which overlooked the entire island ... it was quite spectacular. As we were looking out, I heard a scream from one of the group members, our guide decided to giver her a close-up, one on one introduction to the biggest spider I've ever seen. I'd say this thing was bigger than my palm, harmless though ... so I was told. He was showing everyone this creature. Naturally, I wanted a nice close-up picture of this beast. After all I wanted to see how well my zoom lense worked. The next destination was ... lunch. They drove us up to a restaurant where we experienced the most amazing Thai food ever. I have to admit, these Thailand tours we've done have been very generous with their lunches. From the restaurant, there was another great view of the island. Again wanted to end the tour and just stay there forever. The next and final destination was to the giant Buddha. We went through another fun-filled drive through the woods and ended up back in town to see the Buddha. Actually, this was probably the worst part of the trip ... there wasn't much to see. The Buddha looked run down and dirty. It was actually a shame to see what was once very beautiful, was not taken care of. You can't blame the weather because, there are parts that could easily been taken care of, re-painted, etc. But, I digress! We didn't actually spend too much time there, so that was OK. As I said earlier, good things had to come to an end and this tour included. I was dropped off at the hotel at around 6.

I met up with Leanne shortly after and we decided on our next destination which was Phuket. Leanne informed me that there were 2 ways we could get there: another over-night bus or spend an extra $20 to fly there. Hmmmmmm ... decisions, decisions. Naturally, we decided to purchase a ticket to fly the next morning. The rest of the evening, we explored the town, found a nice little restaurant on the side streets, then went back to get ready for the next journey.

So, after a rough two days wrestling with monkeys, treking through the jungles on elephants and dodging poisonous spiders the size of a poodles, our hero got ready for his next destination ... Phuket. Tomorrow morning he will be on his way in his private jet.

To be continued (much sooner I promise) ..... I